My Apologies

I know I'm about 23 days overdue for some sort of recognition that it is a new year but if you couldn't tell just by the calendar, overcrowded gyms and sold out health food stores, there is probably a bigger problem. What is my New Year's resolution, you ask? To open a savings account and to be able to do a split again. I feel this ever pressing need to become more financially responsible and sound with my money. I want to have enough to give back.  As I enter the workforce, I'm thinking about my retirement beach cottage in Emerald Isle and making sure that, when the time comes, I've got enough to get there. As for the split, I've been feeling the 'I miss ballet' pangs lately. You know its bad when you get emotional watching a documentary on ballerinas in New York. I had to stop due to health reasons and I'll be honest in saying that I've never really let go of that bitterness. Damn Lyme. I want to be able to do a split again because I miss the stretching…. and I guess its a pretty cool thing to be able to do. In short, its something that I once could do and now I can't.

On a more serious note, I've also made a commitment to taking the two seconds to say "I'm sorry" to those who need my apologies. Those of you who know me, know that saying these two words isn't something I'm very good at. I'm incredibly prideful and taking a moment to acknowledge that I have done something wrong risks cracking holes in the immense walls I've built up around my heart that ensures that people take me seriously. I realize now though, that my prideful inability to say sorry has taken its tole on my relationships and I want to stop this cycle now. I won't make excuses because my friends deserve more than that. I'm not sure that many of the people who need to read this ever will but I have faith that God will allow me to cross burned bridges maybe for just those two seconds. So if you need it from me…. I'm sorry. If you feel as if I owe you an apology, please tell me. The best way that I can think of fixing my wrongs is to know what they are. Until then, I will pray for you and maybe you'll pray for me and , eventually, we'll all be alright at the foot of the cross. Growth is change and change is growth. Let's take the opportunity that the New Year offers to all make ourselves a little better than we were last year and love a little better than we did yesterday. 

Pace <3